I was starting school that year, I was scared as hell- come to think of it now- I have no idea what was so frightening?!?
I remember getting lost after break trying to find my classroom- lol; I thought it was the end of the world. You don’t understand how frightening it is, to a five year old (turning six) to be in an environment full of people the same age screaming ,shouting, crying and just running loose. It was chaotic (I think my phobia of being in large groups of people started then)
I came back from school that day to find my mom and a few of my uncles and aunties dancing with Joy, I still was in the dark (confused). Whilst at school, we did hear some commotion earlier that day and we ran to the classroom windows to see what was happening outside…
I ran to my room to put my school bag down and went to sit next to my mom; they were chatting and drinking in celebration. I played a guessing game in my head “is it my birthday today? No, there’s no cake, hmmm, is it my mom’s birthday? No, her twin brother didn’t call as he usually does at midnight” I was a child and with child-like spirit I decided “oh, what the heck, I’ll just be happy because everyone else is happy too” at that time, lol happiness meant 10c for candy to us (Us: children) and such opportunities did not come easy.
My mom had a vinyl music player system (today- a cd/dvd player system), we didn’t have TV at the time; it was sort-of my job to change the vinyl’s and playing new ones (so we could say I was the DJ). Suddenly everyone wanted the music off. My mom started singing sweet melody that she had been working on with my aunty… “Welcome to the new daaaays of what is moooore to come…bazomkhiphuMadiba Mmaaa…” my aunt followed her and all the grown ups in the room join in the chorus.
I was somehow happy and not scared this time (then), before this day- it use to be whispers in the night- people talking in the dark, songs that lit fire inside you and long meetings through out the night. As I set there watching them overwhelmed by all the excitement and different feel I thought back a year ago, I was four turning 5 that year, FW De Clerk was taking over from Botha, there was always some strike going on and loud music with songs that pierced though ones heart as a child because of lack of understanding. But today as a year after, the people in this room looked different, they looked at me differently, they some how knew something that I couldn’t figure out. But as I looked back at them whilst they sang- they all sang to me and smiled as if saying “its all for you”.
Today (now), its 20 years later- I understand what those looks meant. Today I know what they were singing about. Those people had hope, they had faith and they knew there was a brighter future, a free country in the making, a liberal generation, a new chance and a new start…for me.
I remember getting lost after break trying to find my classroom- lol; I thought it was the end of the world. You don’t understand how frightening it is, to a five year old (turning six) to be in an environment full of people the same age screaming ,shouting, crying and just running loose. It was chaotic (I think my phobia of being in large groups of people started then)
I came back from school that day to find my mom and a few of my uncles and aunties dancing with Joy, I still was in the dark (confused). Whilst at school, we did hear some commotion earlier that day and we ran to the classroom windows to see what was happening outside…
I ran to my room to put my school bag down and went to sit next to my mom; they were chatting and drinking in celebration. I played a guessing game in my head “is it my birthday today? No, there’s no cake, hmmm, is it my mom’s birthday? No, her twin brother didn’t call as he usually does at midnight” I was a child and with child-like spirit I decided “oh, what the heck, I’ll just be happy because everyone else is happy too” at that time, lol happiness meant 10c for candy to us (Us: children) and such opportunities did not come easy.
My mom had a vinyl music player system (today- a cd/dvd player system), we didn’t have TV at the time; it was sort-of my job to change the vinyl’s and playing new ones (so we could say I was the DJ). Suddenly everyone wanted the music off. My mom started singing sweet melody that she had been working on with my aunty… “Welcome to the new daaaays of what is moooore to come…bazomkhiphuMadiba Mmaaa…” my aunt followed her and all the grown ups in the room join in the chorus.
I was somehow happy and not scared this time (then), before this day- it use to be whispers in the night- people talking in the dark, songs that lit fire inside you and long meetings through out the night. As I set there watching them overwhelmed by all the excitement and different feel I thought back a year ago, I was four turning 5 that year, FW De Clerk was taking over from Botha, there was always some strike going on and loud music with songs that pierced though ones heart as a child because of lack of understanding. But today as a year after, the people in this room looked different, they looked at me differently, they some how knew something that I couldn’t figure out. But as I looked back at them whilst they sang- they all sang to me and smiled as if saying “its all for you”.
Today (now), its 20 years later- I understand what those looks meant. Today I know what they were singing about. Those people had hope, they had faith and they knew there was a brighter future, a free country in the making, a liberal generation, a new chance and a new start…for me.
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