Never back down from a good fight… Actually, never ever back down from ANY fight!
There is an amazing feeling that one gets whilst in the midst of anger, fighting (not physically) and or arguing… Somehow our ears seem to be picky of what we hear and the phrasing of words differ from what they actually sound like or are supposed to be received; we somehow become oblivious to reality and to the main issue at hand that got us into the argument.
The mind… Our strongest weapon turns and becomes the enemy to self. We kind of self-distrust as though a ticking bomb sitting and waiting. It is amusing and at the same time amazes me that my senses fool around with my body such as getting a bitter taste in your mouth, sudden fever that keeps climbing higher and high, ears having a steaming sensation as though a steam train, cheeks flushed red due to the high temperature, Eyes WIDE open as though screaming in silence, nostrils wide open breathing dry but yet humid air as though suffocating.
Hormones playing yin-yang inside our bodies as adrenalin oozes around our muscles and you see and tell from posture and hand gestures that a fist or open hand smack might be delivered at any given time. Anger, makes the body warm; it drives the the 3rd and last part from the sigmoid colon in the human body craaazy, and the twitch just somehow connects straight to your mouth and all that is foul comes out.
Regardless of who is right and who is wrong, in a fight we do not care; we only want to be heard… Yet, we lack listening… we lack patience … we lack understanding and mostly we cannot put ourselves in the other person standing in front of our shoes. All of this we call emotion; an emotional rollercoaster; passion and irrational behavior.
At that time it does not hurt, at that time the mind is not processing but just choosing whatever it can use to back fire… and it shoots back using the mouth as its pistol to hurt, to gain an upper hand, to wound, to shield ego. Later on… the heart processes all the echo left behind and hinders forgiveness.
The next time another argument comes up, the mind goes to the archive drawer and pulls the many last fights or arguments and overwhelms the new argument building emotions that come from the past and connecting unfitting puzzle pieces to create a phantom existing big piece of art that causes pain, guilt, resentment, hatred and again… anger.
After all that, do you still want to stand and fight?... Remember, you are hurting no one but YOURSELF.
Things happen and so many come as shocking surprises and others as forgotten truths that we all wish not to witness the coming or final discovery of it. Its hard to face head on your worst fears and realising that what you always perceived and predicted as true is in fact the truth. Its all about having a back bone to be able to stand and face this world. When you are in pain and in bed on your own and no one hears and sees your thoughts, those are the deciding moments of your life. That is the time when one makes a choice to be or not to be. Only the strong prevail, only the might walk on. As we face the tides in out lives, we forget not that we once walked to the parks of the union buildings and shared our future plans and dreams under the beautiful clear blue summer skies. Now drifted and miles and oceans apart, we still hang on and look forward to a better tomorrow. Hold my hand and never let go, I will be an idea and you will be the wisdom behind it. There is so much that is still...
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